好笑又寒心的婚姻语录
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<DIV style="COLOR: #000000; FONT-SIZE: 14px" id=blogDetailDiv eventsListUID="e57">
<DIV class=blog_details_20120222>
<DIV>以前提到结婚,想到「天长地久」;</DIV>
<DIV>现在提到结婚,想到「能撑多久」。</DIV>
<DIV>当初会结婚,说是「看上眼」;</DIV>
<DIV>后来会离婚,说是「看走眼」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,爱情是神话;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,爱情是笑话。</DIV>
<DIV>男人花钱,是为了让女人高兴;</DIV>
<DIV>女人花钱,是因为男人让她不高兴。</DIV>
<DIV>嫁入「豪门」,要懂得理财;</DIV>
<DIV>嫁入「寒门」,要懂得生财。</DIV>
<DIV>以前的人,视婚姻生活为「一辈子」;</DIV>
<DIV>现代的人,视婚姻生活为「一阵子」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人在餐厅等女人;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,女人在客厅等男人。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人经常找女人「讨论」;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,男人只告诉女人「结论」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人对她悄悄讲话;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,男人对她大声讲话。</DIV>
<DIV>恋爱时,情话绵绵;</DIV>
<DIV>结婚后,谎话连连。</DIV>
<DIV>恋爱时的男人,喜欢「毛手毛脚」;</DIV>
<DIV>结婚后的男人,变成「没手没脚」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,情侣做什么都是「浪漫」;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,夫妻做什么都是「浪费」。</DIV>
<DIV>想结婚,是自己已能独立;</DIV>
<DIV>想离婚,是子女已独立。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前的男人,大都很幽默;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后的男人,大都很沉默。</DIV>
<DIV>女人的记性,吵架时最好;</DIV>
<DIV>男人的耐性,结婚后最差。</DIV>
<DIV>恋爱时,一见面就「亲嘴」;</DIV>
<DIV>结婚后,一见面就「斗嘴」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人常给女人「空白支票」;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,男人常给女人「空头支票」。</DIV>
<DIV>恋爱时,生活「妙不可言」;</DIV>
<DIV>结婚后,日子「苦不堪言」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人天天盯着女人;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,女人天天盯着男人。</DIV>
<DIV>热恋时,总相许下辈子再结良缘;</DIV>
<DIV>结婚后,怀疑上辈子造作孽缘。</DIV>
<DIV>大男人,会「作威作福」;</DIV>
<DIV>好男人,会「作牛作马」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,「谎话」都是「情话」;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,「情话」都是「废话」。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,靠近一点;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,闪开一点。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,没话找话说;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,有话也不说。</DIV>
<DIV>「成功」?对男人的定义是指能赚很多的钱,</DIV>
<DIV>对女人的定义是指能花很多的钱。</DIV>
<DIV>男人有钱就变坏,</DIV>
<DIV>女人变坏就有钱。</DIV>
<DIV>男人没有女人,耳根清净;</DIV>
<DIV>女人没有男人,居家干净。</DIV>
<DIV>男人「入错行」,上班会很痛苦;</DIV>
<DIV>女人「嫁错郎」,下班会很痛苦。</DIV>
<DIV>好女人,养坏男人的胃口;</DIV>
<DIV>坏女人,吊足男人的胃口。</DIV>
<DIV>婚前,男人像传令兵;</DIV>
<DIV>婚后,男人像指挥官。</DIV>
<DIV>失恋不见得是世界末日:</DIV>
<DIV>你的心也许会「泣血」,</DIV>
<DIV>你的荷包却可以不再「失血」。 </DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV>出生一张纸,开始一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>毕业一张纸,奋斗一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>婚姻一张纸,折磨一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>做官一张纸, 斗争一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>金钱一张纸,辛苦一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>荣誉一张纸,虚名一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>看病一张纸,痛苦一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>悼词一张纸,了结一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>淡化这些纸,明白一辈子;</DIV>
<DIV>忘了这些纸,快乐一辈子!</DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
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<DIV><BR></DIV></DIV></DIV><IMG style="POSITION: relative; DISPLAY: none; TOP: auto" id=paperPicArea1 src="http://b1.qzone.qq.com/ac/b.gif">
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